cos someone wouldnt sharrap about it! tee hee rove ya!

chapter one

Pascal awoke to the cooing of the ravens, does ravens even exist, I don't know, but if they did, they'd sound a lot like crying babies. "Not a good start" he thinks to himself as he counts to ten, making a promise to himself to get up and cook some instant ramen as his stomach commands him to. "8,9,10... 11, 12, 13" still his willpower was nothing to be proud of.

He eventually overcame the spur of laziness that hangs before him like that creepy little woman from Ju-On, with the bed scene, and the creepiness, rawr!.. as he sat on his bed in a semi fetal position, poking on his knees that was still covered by his blanket. Yes, Pascal was a man that would still have his blanket on perfect as he sleeps, that is how lazy he is, he doesn't even move in his sleep. Brilliant writing here.

Pascal scratches and yawns his way into the kitchen, the surprisingly neat little kitchen, complete with all white cabinets that matches his fridge, his secret pride and joy. No dear readers, Pascal is not bent, he is as straight as an arrow, rest assured that I wanted to write a whole toilet scene where he takes an epic leak just to boost his masculinity, but I do have female readers and no, chivalry ain't dead. He opens up his well stocked pantry, that has almost everything besides preserved cow brains in 2% milk, because that would just be sick, its either full cream or nothing at all. He reaches for 2 packs of indomee mee goreng (sponsorship whore, I am, I am) opens both of them up and puts the kettle on, switches off the kettle, put water in and then put the kettle back on. Annoyed and reassured, Pascal began reading his emails....

to be continued, i might make this either a daily or a weekly thing, we'll go according to the responses that i get

Give a man a match, and he'll be warm for a minute, but set him on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life. - quotesgarden

achtung - the following post was typed up with a clear conscience, i mean, clear like empty as hell, cos im just gonna let my fingers do the talking rather than think shit up.

rightey o, your beloved blogger, oh please do stop the applause, make me shy laaaa, where was i, oh yeah, your beloved blogger is back, and is all raged and shit, ready to attack uni at full force. i must rephrase this sentence one of these days before i get arrested.. please dont arrest me... get idzo instead...(haha sorry idzo i just cant do a post without burning ya)

lets talk about laziness shall we? laziness can be defined as the lack of will, to do anything really, procrastination is the younger brother of laziness, pretending like its not a part of the family, like an emo child having dinner with his conservative family at sizzlers.. yes dear emo child, procrastination is as much a part of laziness as a visa to a passport (yeah, i write as i see the shit on my table)

it affects us all dont it, admit it you bastards, how many times a day do you stop yourself from doing something on the grounds of laziness? i asked you a question damn it! answer me! no not that loud, this aint no dora the explorer, now sharrap and keep reading.. laziness affects all of us, great and small, from the mightiest of beast to the lowliest of idzaid (feel free to burn me on your blog hehe), it rules us all, governs us with a soft, pillowy fist, instills random thoughts in our heads like out of nowhere u will get a mental picture of the brand of toilet bowl that you last saw in the shopping mall and decided to decode anagrams out of it...

armitage shanks...

shag me thanks... no wait that wont work...

anyhoots the point that i was trying to get across is the idea or notion that we dont pursuit laziness, it just creeps up on us, and distracts us with a wave of its magical wand filled with what i like to believe; angel dust... mmmmm angel dust.. ever so mildly 80's i am today...

it has reigned over us for years, decades, centuries, millenias.. let us take an example from pop culture shall we, right.. tolkien was well known for the hobbit gay porn that was the lord of the rings right? no please dont respond, it was a rhetorical question... what i dont understand is the portrayal of sauron himself. i mean, was anyone born evil? can you actually prove that a baby hitler would actually commit genocide before he could walk, so yeah, i guess evil is trait gathered by nurture.. so what gives us the rights to call sauron 'evil', just because he was given the appearance of a large menacing eye overlooking all of middle earth, like a giant prehistoric K.L tower, does not show his tyranny..

where am i going with this, ah right dear reader... where in the hell does it show that sauron was an evil man, eye, or whatever the hell he was, like what kind of a childhood did he have, prolly one of those "my uncle touched my papa's ping ping" (kiss kiss bang bang, 2005) kind of childhood, but sadly, we will never know, lest of course someone digs up tolkien and do a little gandalf magic on him.. grab a shovel idzo, we're going grave robbing...

so what is the moral of this story you fucking moron?! i hear you moan. well... err.. i would come up with a conclusion.. but.. malas la..